And would you believe me if I told you there was a way for
you to handle life’s challenges with ease, be a better partner or
parent, become a skilled speaker, get through difficult interviews, or
be more relaxed and socially comfortable even when you’re shy or
introverted?
Because you can.
Regardless of the voice in your head today. Never forget the one area that you unquestionably can control is your own mind.
So no more feeling out of step, out of sorts or plain
numbing yourself with binge watching tv and eating bags of potato crisps
or yummy bars of chocolate. Try this instead:
Tap into the magic
Learn to focus beyond your current experiences.
Incredible emotional magic happens when you begin to see yourself clearly in a future that you are designing in your mind’s eye.
The more excited you become about your potential future
and the YOU that experiences it, the easier it will be for you to alter
the pre-conceived notion that you’re something of a fraud. And then you
can move towards the more meaningful life you deserve.
Which is not being highly educated, the best at
everything, or being perfect. It’s about being really authentic, being
humble and being able to share yourself so you touch the life of others.
Self Acceptance
According to statistics, 70% of us seem to be
afraid that we’ll get found out…that people will discover we’re not as
good as they seem to think and so we focus solely on self-improvement.
After all we’re awash in a culture that’s obsessed with
self-improvement and with those who have brilliant, simple and easy ways
for us to do it.
Self improvement is great. But no matter how much ‘improvement’ you experience, without the vital piece of the puzzle called ‘self-acceptance’, you never get very far. And that feeling of being a fraud will keep popping up throughout your life.
So step up and embrace one of the great paradoxes of life, to accept who you are today, whilst still being a work in progress.
This doesn’t mean you’ve given up…quite the opposite.
Allowing yourself to accept who you are actually sets the stage for and
brings you greater opportunities to make changes and enhancements to
your life in an authentic way.
Too often we can so hung up about what we need to do in
order to be happy, or feel better about ourselves that we miss out on
the authentic, meaningful life that automatically brings happiness to
us.
Being authentically you means living each moment
consciously in acceptance; realizing that all the happiness you seek is
present if you pay attention. Be willing to appreciate that where you
are right now is far better than it might have been and you will enjoy
it more.
Stop being so damned hard on yourself
Hands
up if your first thought is often something along the lines of “Holy
moly, I can’t do this. I shouldn’t be involved. Basically I’m a fraud”.
Try to remember…you’re not where you are because you
tricked anyone and you’re not where you are because you’re just plain
lucky…not such a bad thing anyway!
Truth be told you’re no different than the rest of us, walking a path, stumbling every now and then, picking yourself up and moving on.
An incredibly huge reason you feel that you’re faking it
is because the standards you’ve set yourself are so high as to be out of
the stratosphere. No one, not even the most successful are perfect at
what they do, including you and me. Guess what? No one expects you to be.
Valerie Young puts it so well:
“The important thing is not to take the
discomfort of feeling out of your element to mean you are somehow less
intelligent, capable, or worthy than others. You are where you are
because you deserve to be. Period.” (Read The Secret Thoughts of Successful Women: Why Capable People Suffer from the Impostor Syndrome and How to Thrive in Spite of It)
‘Nuff said!
FYI you’re no more a fraud than the rest
of us, so from now on whenever you feel the need to wear a mask…don’t
dig out the imposter one, put on your superhero/heroine mask and flaunt
the heck out of it.
Encourage one another. By love Elle
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